Tuesday, November 27, 2012

The Adventures - part four

Before I take the intrepid travelers too far into intrepidness, I think it might be important, even if you don't, to explain some little situation that Old Pete left behind in suburbia where he lived in the suburbs.

There was this sheila by the name of Reddie who completed a correspondence course in neurosurgery, with a catch up course of 'How to trim toenails on the elderly'.

Reddie started off her career in Canberra, the political capitol of Australia and consequently, with the lack of brains to work on, she decided to move elsewhere, which took her to some other place, which was somewhere near where Old Pete was living in the burbs.

Reddie set up as a GP, which Old Pete thought meant a Good Person, which she was, and I would defy anyone that said she wasn't; however Old Pete went along to the surgery one day and met Reddie, or Doctor Reddie, as she became to be known because of the fact of her correspondence course, and not necessarily because of the toenail clippers that sat on her desk.

At anyrate, Dr Reddie instantly, in a matter of the flash of an eyelash, as quick as a wink and probably a tad quicker, fell in love with the humble, handsome, charming and most love-able Old Pete.

As you can imagine, it was most difficult for Dr Reddie to check Old Pete's prostate gland whilst being in love with him at the same time, and there was one time that Old Pete, being the fool and great humorist that he is, jokingly commented, when Dr Reddie had her finger on the pulse of his walnut, "Does this mean we are engaged?"

Dr Reddie, quickly retorted with a retort that was a bit of a quick come back to Old Pete's comment.
"Well you might say that Old Pete. After all, I do have your ring on my finger."

Old Pete thought this was very funny and it momentarily took his mind off the sharp fingernails (that he thought the Doctor could have used the toenail clippers on) however the joke was not all that funny, and he thought 'I wish I had another joke', but as hard as he thought he couldn't, so he gave up thinking and just grimaced at the long and tedious, for want of a better word, prostate examination, and the light caress of another part of his body wot was hanging down on the examination table, which he thought was an accident, but being the gentlemen he was, he didn't mention this light caress as he thought it was nice and he didn't want to embarrass Dr Reddie, as he thought it would. Old Pete was very thoughtful in situations like this.

Sadly, Dr Reddie re-read the Neurosurgery Correspondence Course papers and accompanying certificate and there it was in the fine print, "Once having become a Neurosurgeon with our Academy of all things learned and Academic, the person or persons that have one of these bits of paper, must not fall in love with a patient whilst doing a prostate examination, especially if the patient is a male, and the certificated one is a female, or for that matter some other gender, or whatever."

It was clear to Dr Reddie that this had been writ by some Academic Lawyer, wot musta' been academicized at the same Academy by correspondence, as Dr Reddie herself. She had only one course of action in the circumstances, well in truth she had several choices, but only one ifn' she wanted to do any brain surgery.

Much thought was given to Dr Reddie's response to the situation of loving a patient ... or it will be in the next episode of The Adventures, as I haven't given it much thought just yet.

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