Laconic.

Laconic: I love the word Laconic, I love what it means, and I enjoy the person that uses the art of laconicism.

You can be laconic, and laconical, but the word is not the art. In reality the word means Spartan or from the Laconians, and indicates the use of few words to explain a large problem.

Of course, you can look all this up on the net, but the be truly laconic, you have to be an Outback Aussie, who's entire life has been based on the principle “She'll be right mate.” This expression is Laconic in itself.

The true laconical expressions are found deep in the Agricultural members of our country, as an example, I rang a farmer in Gunnedah in NSW, at a time that a long drought had ended with with good soaking rain.

“You must be laughin' now that the drought is over, hey Joe?”

“How'd ya' work that out, it only rained rain, it didn't rain grass.”

Another was from a bloke that was a known bar-fly, a worker that spent his pay on grog, and when he ran out he would see if he could cadge a drink out of other bloke's pay.

He was cruising the bar of a local pub when he spied a likely victim.

“Well, I'll be buggered, haven't seen you for a while,” He cordially welcomed the suspect.

“Yeah, G' Day Cookie, 'ow ya' goin?”

“Good mate, are ya' gunna have a beer.”

“Yeah, a couple maybe.” Sed the mark.

“Good,” said Cookie, make mine a schooner.”

Things when wrong from there on as far as Cookie was concerned, his long lost mate, all of a sudden, changed his mind and told, Cookie that he had to be somewhere else, and promptly left the pub.

Cookie stood with his hands on his hips and glared at the departing 'mate'.

“That bloke,” He told the bar, “Is that tight with the quid that if he cut ya' a slice of bread there would only on side in it.”

Now, that is laconic.

The expression: Freeze the balls off a brass monkey, which is not in relation to monkey's testicle in the winter, has been superseded for Australian conditions, by some laconic Aussie as being, Freeze the walls of a bark humpy, now that is clever larconacism, don't ya' reckon?